Giving a gift in return is called okaeshi. In Japan the courtesy custom of exchanging gifts remains strongly entrenched to preserve the harmony of human relationships. There are general standards of when and how both to give gifts and give them in return. Gifts are sent for auspicious events, at times of mourning, at the midyear and at the year-end;(midyear present)(year-end present) and those to whom gifts have been sent, in accordance with customary practice, do okaeshi.
By giving gifts and doing okaeshi in this way, human relationships are confirmed. A person receiving gifts without doing okaeshi and not sending gifts when they should be sent is regarded as being ignorant of moral obligation.
Long ago a Taoist ritual, chugen took on the influence of the Buddhist Bon Festival, which was held around the same time, as well as the Japanese way of thinking in dividing the year into two halves, and it became an event for honoring ancestors and celebrating the safety of the first half of the year. The custom of afterwards sharing with relatives and others items, first offered up to spirits of the dead, changed into the current custom of courteously exchanging gifts. Consequently, chugen today principally refers to gifts that individuals and businesses send from early in July to July 15th to people to whom they are indebted.
This is a gift sent in the middle of December. Compared with the midyear chugen gift, this one signifies gratitude for kindnesses throughout the year, so it costs somewhat more than chugen. Early in December department stores begin to get crowded with people buying gifts, and that hustle and bustle is a part of the year-end scenery that gives a real sense of the approaching new year. Usually, people say oseibo, adding the prefix o to express politeness.
This is a card sent as a greeting for the new year. It usually has a picture of an animal appropriately corresponding with that year's sexagenary cycle(eto) and is sent so that it arrives on New Year's Day. Government post cards indicating a New Year's gift are popular, because the prize is awarded by lottery. Most business nengajo come complete with the printed contents, while writing one's own nengajo can tax one's ingenuity. Nengajo arrive from old friends; it is a pleasure both to write such cards and to receive them.
Shochumimai is a postcard sent to greet someone from around July 15th until the setting in of fall around August 8th. If it is sent after that, it is called a postcard asking after one's health in the lingering summer. The Japanese summer with its high heat and humidity frequently saps the body's strength and destroys its tone, so this is a custom that emerged from ascertaining the well-being of close friends at such a time.
Nowadays, it has become a courtesy to send these cards even to business acquaintances, but they are not as common as New Year's cards.
Otoshidama is money given at New Year to children by parents and relatives who come to visit. Originally, it was said to be a custom born from sharing rice cakes dedicated to the deities at New Year as something bestowed anew by the deities. In recent years, along with the reduced number of children, the amount of otoshidama money given to one child is increasing. So much that it is not so strange for parents with a lot of expenses at this season to want to make a loan of the money to their children.
Originally, this meant money saved by "spinning"(kuru) the "reel"(heso) and it referred to the free spending money that housewives, who under the feudal society's patriarchal system could not touch the family finances, barely earned with side jobs. At present, it means a small amount of money secretly saved by frugal means, and, perhaps because the word heso of hesokuri also means the navel besides the reel, it is regarded as a word with a comical nuance rather than with a tragic feeling.
The bonus was originally a special award, but now most businesses and government and public agencies provide it at the established times of summer and year end. There are two ways of thinking about this, whether to see it as a part of living wage or as a distribution of excess profit; the bonus amount fluctuates depending on economic trends, business earnings, and the power relationship with labor unions. Most loan repayment plans are made with the bonus in mind, and it is also used at year's end to buy year-end gifts.
Bonenkai means a party occurring in December to drink sake and forget that year's hard labor and unpleasantnesses. Originally, it took place as a gathering for family, relatives and friends, but now groups from the workplace and groups of people, sharing the same taste or interest in amusement, go as units to Japanese bars and restaurants and sometimes even to karaoke to celebrate together in lively enjoyment. In addition, just after the new year, a party called the New Year Party takes place. Both are regular parties with no special ceremonies.